Hello,

I have been bullied at school by a close friend of mine. Me and this friend/bully had been good friends because we were both academically inclined. However, she had a lot more friends than me while I had close to none. During our friendship, she was kind to me but behind my back she spread many rumours about me to all her other friends. In the next grade, I still thought we were good friends so I told her my average, then the social problems tripled and most of my peers who are both academically and socially inclined started to isolate me and spread rumours about me. Whenever I made new friends they were told made-up stories about me and hence, I had no real friends and was later afraid of my academic successes.

K....

Dear K....

I was sorry to read about the difficult and sad time you have had at school. Bullying is a deeply hurtful and lonely experience which no-one should have to go through. It is wrong and totally unacceptable to spread rumours about someone and exclude them from things. Like all types of bullying, it is devastating and must be taken very seriously. It's so hard when on top of the immediate pain of bullying, young people also become anxious about developing and expressing their potential.

Thankfully, many people who have been bullied do go on to live full lives and find they can once again express and develop their talents and interests. I hope you will soon be able to do the same and to once again follow and enjoy a more academic path. I hope you have been able to talk to teachers at school about this, not just to get support but because they should be aware of the effect this has had on your studying and your motivation. This is not your fault.

If you would like to talk to someone directly about the effect this has had you could also contact Childline which has a 24 hour helpline on 0800 1111 or you could contact the Samaritans by phone or email, telephone 08457 909090 or email: jo@samaritans.org.

With my best wishes,

Anti-Bullying Network Adviser