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Most of the time that
I spent at school I lived in fear because of bullying, although
I did not experience any physical abuse. I was slim and I
wore braces on my teeth. I was also very shy and I liked to
get on with my school work. I had a few friends who were also
fairly quiet.
Almost everyday for
about two years I was called names and laughed at - not just
by one person but by my whole class. All my teachers knew
about the bullying but very little was done to stop it. I
never told my parents and neither did the teachers. I felt
so alone, ashamed and very ugly. I often thought about suicide
but I did not want to die, all that I wanted was for it all
to stop, I wanted someone to save me. The bullying never really
stopped. I was still being pointed at, laughed at and called
names right until I left school.
I spent years with braces
on my teeth and I had an operation at the age of 16. I thought
the surgery would change the way I looked but it changed very
little and I still felt just as ugly.
The bullying has affected
my whole life. When I was just 17 I ended up seeing the first
man that spoke to me in my local pub, and he was twice my
age! He was not what I wanted but I was so flattered by his
attention. Most of the bullying I received came from boys
so it was so nice to have a man interested in me, and I did
not care who he was! After a few months I ended the relationship
because I knew it was not right. I then met a wonderful man!
I told him all about my life and he was very supportive. I
am 21 now and I still lack confidence. Going to the local
shop on my own is extremely stressful and I usually avoid
going anywhere on my own. I still hate walking past school
children in case they laugh at me.
I am
happy with my appearance now and my partner tells me everyday
how beautiful I am and I think he is telling me the truth.
Looking back my experience was awful and I thought it would
never end, all I ever wanted was to be saved from it all.
A day in school could feel like forever. I could see no way
out and I thought I had to go school or something bad would
happen. I think that everybody should realise how serious
bullying is because it causes life-long psychological problems
or worse.
M....
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